On the way to Cape May

I recently blogged about lessons that I learned from spending time with my nieces. Well, this past weekend, I took another trip that taught me different lessons that I wanted to share.

After almost 3 years of being married, my husband and I found a rare free weekend and went to Cape May- just the 2 of us. It was much needed, well deserved (if I do say so), and it turned out to be one of the best weekends we have spent together as a married couple. Here is what I learned.

1. Marine life is fascinating.

Since I read my favorite book (She’s Come Undone) when I was 19, and the main character went whale watching, I have wanted to go myself. On this trip I finally got the chance, and it was really an amazing experience. We were told not to expect to actually see a whale, but when we did, it took my breath away. It wasn’t just the whale itself, but fulfilling a dream that I’ve had for so many years that made it so special. The captain told gave us some really interesting information about the marine life that we saw that made the trip that much more enjoyable. I have never been a huge animal lover, but I loved this experience. The only upsetting part of the trip was hearing about how awful captivity is for dolphins and how for every 1 in captivity, there were 3 captured and that being taken out of the wild decreases their life expectancy from 50 to 5 years. It made Kevin and I feel bad about a previous excursion where we swam with these awesome creatures. Something for everyone to think about.

2. Bed and Breakfasts are great places to stay.

We had never stayed at a Bed and Breakfast before, but we loved this experience. It is a little more expensive than it would have been to stay at a motel or hotel, but you can’t beat the personal touches. The innkeepers were like hanging out with your aunt and uncle, the food was better than most restaurants, and we have already talked about going back. I definitely recommend every couple trying this at least once.

3. I still miss my son when I’m away from him.

You would think that after almost 20 months, I would get used to spending time away from Cole. I do it every day when I go to work and have been away from him overnight a couple times before. But as much fun as we had, that angel baby was always on my mind. Kevin even gave a random kid a penny to throw in a fountain because he reminded us of Cole.

4. I am no longer 21.

Okay, I guess I knew that. I mean, in a matter of weeks I will be 10 years away from 21. But it really hit me Saturday night. We were sitting in a bar called Carney’s, listening to an old Irish singer belt out Irish folk songs and popular ballads when I heard the band in the other room playing “I Wanna Be Sedated” which is a song that I love. I commented about it, and Kevin asked if I wanted to go listen to the band. At that moment, I realized that I was perfectly content where I was, listening to the crooner, his cheesy songs and cheesier jokes, in a room where we were the youngest people by 20 years. I just don’t remember when I got so old.

5. It is definitely possible to fall in love with your husband again.

Even after only 3 years of marriage, it is possible to fall into a rut. We are busy people, working and raising our son, and though we try to make time for each other, we aren’t always successful. I never question whether or not I love my husband, but I don’t always take the time to appreciate that love. This weekend, I did. I think we both did. We just really took the time to enjoy what we have together. Sitting on the boat on our whale watching adventure, Kevin leaned towards me and whispered, “On the way to Cape May, I fell in love with you.” Baby, to your cheesy sentiment, I have to say ditto.



Listening to music at an Irish bar



Lessons

While my entire world, and therefore blog, seems to revolve around Cole, I recently spent time with two other interesting subjects and felt that I would be remiss in not writing about them this time. I call these subjects Noli and Marleigh.

For those of you who don’t know, Noli and Marleigh are my nieces and they are 4 and 3, respectively. They are definitely characters and if I learned anything in spending two weekends in a row with them, it’s that I should keep pen and paper on hand in their presence, because I wish I had written down so many of the outrageous things that came out of their mouths. Here are some of the other lessons that I learned.

1. They can be really sweet when they want to be.

- Noli was really scared to go away to our friends’ house where there were going to be dogs, so Marleigh told her, “Don’t worry, Noli. I’ll hold your hand and protect you.”

- Several times while we were down the shore, Noli just looked at me and, for no reason at all, said, “I love you, Aunt Michelle.”

2. Even at this age, they can be boy crazy.

When we were in North Carolina, Marleigh was not shy about her interest in Tom, an engaged man. She flirted with him, kissed him and hung all over him. And when we were down the shore, she had a complete conversation with Noli about how Tom should be marrying her instead of his fiancée Kelly. I’m scared to see what they will be like at 16.

3. They like bathroom humor as much as 12 year old boys.

Yes, they are little girls, but they think burping, tooting (farting) and talking about anything related to body parts is hilarious. Very charming.

4. Don’t piss them off!

Yes, they can be nice and sweet, but if they don’t get their way, watch out. They scream and cry and throw things and are downright scary. Sometimes it is so dramatic that you can’t help but laugh and then they just get angrier. It’s fun to watch Cole stare at them like they’re crazy, though.

5. I wish I had their innocence.

Despite everything else, seeing how fascinated they are with everyday things makes me wish I could be a child again and completely warms my heart. Something as simple as jumping over waves or looking for “mermaid purses” on the beach produces the biggest smiles and makes all your troubles fade away.



Marleigh and Noli on the way to North Carolina